Many of us hold our fathers in the highest esteem. My adoration goes way beyond “my dad can beat up your dad.” Daniel Benjamin “Bud” Alexis was an amazing man. Somehow he found that perfect balance between the hands on, attentive father and the workaholic stereotype that had a world to conquer. The value of hard work was an ever present lesson, along with laughter, love, and learning new things.
Becoming a believer of Jesus Christ while in the Marine Corps, he found himself called to a life of service and ministry. Through the years he served the role of pastor, evangelist, kid’s crusade evangelist, boys group leader, children’s pastor, and the list is endless. He poured both passion and innovation in everything he did. In the 1970’s he couldn’t just have a week long kid’s crusade. The week had to be packed with custom painted scenes, life size characters, homemade squirrel puppets, lights and quadraphonic sound. Even into his seventies he was creating multi-media presentations for children’s church using Power Point, Photoshop and all those other things that most fifty year olds shy away from.
Besides ministry, he was also an accomplished carpenter. Six years ago I decided to completely renovate my house. He wanted to lead the project at the age of sixty-eight. We had an incredible time working together on that project. He had a special hammer which he had for many years. This hammer was a well balanced master carpenters hammer with a red fiberglass handle. He had other hammers in his tool box, but this hammer was his. No one else could touch it … except me. You see, I was his son. We joked about there being a hierarchy in hammers. The other helpers could use the wooden hammers, or the yellow or blue hammer. But only qualified master carpenters could use the red hammer.
On September 19, 2013, my dad changed his address to heaven at the age of seventy-four. It was unexpected and difficult for a family who had a clear patriarch to look to. The parade of friend’s hugs helped, but I started paying more attention to the condolences of friends who I knew had lost their fathers within the last few years. As I had many conversations with God during this time and reflected on these friends who had walked the same road, God clearly spoke these word to me, “The great ones are leaving you. It is time for you step up now and be the great ones for the next generation.”
Those words are the heaviest revelation I have ever received. In the months that followed, several more of my friends also lost their fathers. I began to share these words with them. I found we all felt the same, that we could never adequately fill the shoes of our fathers, but we agreed that it was our responsibility to try.
On a visit to my mom to take care of some of the family business I saw, in my father’s workshop, the red hammer. I asked if I could have it. It hangs on the wall in my office as a constant reminder that the hammer has been passed. The red hammer was used to teach me much more than how to drive a nail. It represents a life lived to teach me how to love, laugh and learn. To be a great man of faith and pass on what I learn to the next generation.
Solomon had these words to say to his son, “My child, listen to me and do as I say, and you will have a long, good life. I will teach you wisdom’s ways and lead you in straight paths. When you walk, you won’t be held back; when you run, you won’t stumble. Take hold of my instructions; don’t let them go. Guard them, for they are the key to life.” (Proverbs 4:10-13 NLT) We all have a role to play in stepping into the shoes of those who have gone before us. To listen to those words of wisdom and become the person that God has called us to be. As for me, my hand is gripped tightly around the handle of the red hammer.
